remodeling this life

I had one of those evenings. A few hours where I just was able to slow down and look at the life I have going on and appreciate it. My hubby came home and said he’d make dinner and clean up (and even though he fell asleep on the couch before the kitchen was clean it’s the thought that counts, right?) and he told me he arranged a credit at a landscaping place in town and I have the afternoon tomorrow to go pick out plants/trees/flowers for the yard and house. I am not sure what I am more excited about – the landscaping or the shopping by myself

The kids have been so great. Drew put on a princess dress tonight and her princess high heels and grabbed some flowers from a vase and said to her daddy “will you be my valentine and marry me?” and Eli – well, he’s tired today because he barely napped but he’s just been so cute and snuggly.

Hubby – well, he’s been great too. He’s tired. He’s worked so hard for so long. He gives all of himself to everything he does. And then comes home to offer as much as he has left to his family in smiles and giggles and games and love.

Putting the kids to bed tonight I had that overwhelming feeling of how lucky I am. How fortunate I am to have two very healthy and happy kids and a loving and hardworking husband. As I read books with Drew and snuggled in the rocking chair with Eli I thought of how every moment could be my last. Or their last. In life you just never know. And I have my times of being frustrated and just wanting time for myself or just wanting them to go to bed sooner or whatever. But I let all that go and I just enjoyed it. Enjoyed the snuggles and hugs and stories and giggles and forgot about anything other than just being what they needed. With the thoughts in my mind “what if this is the last time I ever read her a story?” or “what if this is the last time I ever snuggle my son?” and “what if I never get to tell him I love him again?” I made sure it was special. It made me stop and slow down and remember what is really important. Why I am here. What time my kids go to bed doesn’t matter. I just want them to know they are loved. Know that their mom would do anything for them. I want my baby girl to remember me brushing her hair and singing her songs before bed. I want my baby boy to remember me giggling with him and carrying him around showing him the amazing things there are to see in the world.

I can’t ever be sure they’ll remember me for those things if this day were my last. But I tried. I can only give them a footprint. A part of me to remember. I vow to make that me a smiling and appreciative me. A me that would do anything for them and give anything for them. A me that loves them more than anything else in the world and appreciates them for all that they are and all that they dream to be.

This was a fun week. I spent a lot of time being social, including 5 blissful hours last night at a friend’s house with a bunch of girlfriends just gabbing and laughing away without any kids or hubbys in sight. I needed it. It was a good week for me, in terms of getting myself back to a positive frame of mind and making sure to slow my pace a bit.

I read some great stuff along those same lines too – seems it may just be that time of year for soul searching and getting back to basics.

A post that really hit home for me this week was today at Being Frugal - What Women Wish Men Knew About Money. This has everything – feel good stuff, practical advice, and I read #4 to my hubby

Chatting at the Sky’s My Daily Bread was a nod-along for me too. “I realized there was really never such a thing as patient, sweet me and I had certainly never been amazing. At least not in the way I thought. It’s just now that I was married, there was someone always there to reflect the reality of my lack.” Good stuff.

Father Sez was Counting My Blessings Again and Again. The part about looking downward instead of upward really rang true for me.

Nutrition Fitness Life shares about her Me Time in the mornings. Her time to pray, organize or daydream. I think we all need a little of that each day!

And I couldn’t choose just one post from The Inspired Room so just go read everything she’s ever had to say. She’s fabulous!

I also discovered Young and Frugal this week and really have enjoyed those reads so check that out too!

Happy Weekend!

What is beautiful? Beauty comes in so many forms, but to me it’s what makes me feel calm, peaceful, comfortable when I see something, and inevitably brings a smile to my face. It’s the little things that we often miss if we’re moving too fast through this world. Like snowy woods

or waves crashing on a beach

Beautiful isn’t perfection. It’s embracing imperfection. It’s not about perfect hair or perfect skin or a perfect body. Who has any of that anyway without airbrushing? Freckles and a sweet smile go a long way toward beautiful.

And what’s a beautiful home? One decorated so elaborately and ornately that you don’t feel like you can move without breaking something worth the cost of your car? Nope. Not for me. A beautiful home to me is one full of rooms that you feel like you can sit for hours comfortably sipping coffee while chatting away with an old friend. One with heart and soul built with my husband’s bare hands. One full of unique imperfect furniture with history, dents, chipped paint, even crayon marks on it.

Yes, I have found a way to discover beauty in the little things in my life. An hour snuggling on the couch with my kids, a trip to the beach to end a long day, a smile from a stranger with a nod of understanding when I have my hands full with two kids, my daughter running inside after playing in the yard holding out a flower that she picked for me, a good laugh or cry with a dear friend. It’s important to see the beauty in these little things now. Because somehow when I look back someday, I know it’s really the little things that are going to seem so big.