remodeling this life

I love smarties.

When I was in elementary school, one Valentine’s Day after we had handed out cards and candy to everyone in the class, my teacher said that we all could choose something from our Valentine boxes to have as a treat right there in the classroom. I am sure that I tore into my box, dug out a package of smarties and inhaled the whole thing in two seconds flat. I have a bit of a sweet tooth.

The girl who sat next to me, Jamie, also dug out a package of smarties. I remember her carefully opening it, laying the small round pieces of colored sugar in the pencil groove on her desk and leaving them there. She had one. Throughout the day, she would casually stop working on what she was doing, and slowly and deliberately pop another into her mouth, savoring each one. I don’t know why I remember this. Probably because I was in shock. How could she sit there, with candy in front of her and not eat it all right away? I remember trying to will her into eating them faster, gobbling them up so fast, she couldn’t even taste them, getting the sugar rushing through her veins faster.

That is me.

All about the instant gratification. No ability to slow down, savor the good stuff, taking the time to enjoy how something tastes.

Okay, I am getting better. And this is all about improving. Seeing my weakness and realizing that life is about more than just rushing through, gobbling everything up so fast that I forget to enjoy it. I still love smarties. I don’t eat a whole bag of 25 packs of them in 10 minutes anymore though.

Until fairly recently in my adulthood, I was all about having everything I wanted NOW. No matter what it cost or what it took. If I wanted a cute new outfit, I bought it regardless of if I could afford it. If I wanted to go out to dinner, I went and ate whatever I wanted without thinking about it, hardly enjoying it, and never really being able to afford it.

Things have changed and I don’t live like that anymore. I don’t eat too many smarties, I don’t spend more money than I have, I save money before I spend it, and I simply say “no” to a lot of things that I never used to. This has led to a life that is much simpler, costs a lot less, and packs in a lot more enjoyment.

I have been asked many times recently to share more about the frugal life we live. I am not a frugal blogger in the sense that I do not clip coupons and buy more crap than I need just because it’s cheap. My life is frugal, there is no doubt about it. But for us, it’s about a lifestyle not a trip to the store and a false sense of savings. We save money at the bank, not the checkout line. We say no to a lot but yes to the things that matter. We buy quality when we do spend money. Do I still go shopping for cute outfits? Yes. Do I still enjoy lattes from Starbucks? Very much so. I’ve found a balance so that my frugal life isn’t a life of deprivation, but one of consideration, one of determination, and one of careful deliberation so that my family can enjoy the things we love and leave behind the things that simply don’t matter or add to our life satisfaction.

I will be sharing our story – my life from frivolous to frugal – the path I journeyed along to get from a girl who spent more than she had without caring, digging out of debt and getting to a life with no debt, and using only what we have to get what we want and need. Our life is not extravagant by any means. It’s also not a life in which we are deprived of nearly anything that we hold to be important. I hope you’ll enjoy a little series on From Frivolous to Frugal starting soon. I hope it’s encouraging and inspiring. I have shied away from sharing a whole lot about money and frugal living because I feel like it is so personal, like we all do the best we can. But I also know we all can use a little inspiration from time to time. We want to know how someone else did it. How we got from there to here. And why it’s fabulous. So, I will share. And I hope you’ll enjoy.

My baby boy woke up a 3 year old today.

He woke up to a train table in the kitchen. That I was up until nearly midnight putting together last night. While doing laundry in my washer that was delivered at 7 last night.

All that chaos, yet the party must go on. And we must have cupcakes.

Here’s to a fabulous year of being 3. Love you, buddy!

I realize I got a little carried away with photos. I got a new lens yesterday, so you’ll have to forgive me.

I’m home.

My head is swirling, my heart is full.

The time I spent in Nashville meeting so many women I admired through my computer screen for so long was just fabulous. Yes, the hotel was amazing. Yes, the sessions were informative. But the best times were the times I sat at a small table with friends having coffee, or lunch, or dinner. The times spent sitting on a bed in a hotel room and just talking with, laughing with, inspiring and encouraging one another.

I heard over and over again from other people how amazing it was to meet some of these people and to feel like there is nothing different between our online selves and our real life selves. Other than that I did hear quite often how glad people were to know I am human when I took my daily afternoon breaks to have a panic attack each day. Or the times that I cried, one time for no reason, and another for a very big reason. I hope it all just showed we are real people sitting here at our computers. We are women who inspire by being ourselves – even when it’s not pretty.

I spent the morning going through my photos. As it turns out, I talked a lot more than I took pictures. There are people I met that I have been waiting to meet for 2 years and then never took a single photo to document it. Sigh.

I did get some pics, though, so here we go. My weekend of bliss documented in some random snapshots, not nearly enough to capture the real moments. I didn’t have my camera out for when I was laughing so hard at dinner one night, that my gut hurt. I didn’t have my camera when I had coffee with someone who didn’t care that I had stumbled out of bed 6 minutes earlier and we shared our hearts. I didn’t  have my camera when big conversations about life and faith occurred. But it all happened and it all was fabulous and I loved every moment.

Emily (chatting at the sky), Edie (life in grace), Melissa (a familiar path)

Edie, Lindsay (living with lindsay) and Kimm (reinvented)

Amy (mom advice) and me

Melissa (the inspired room) and Kimba (a soft place to land)

Emily and The Nester, who are just about the cutest and sweetest sisters ever.

Then there was the Harry Connick, Jr. concert.

Lindsay

and AnNicole (our suburban cottage)

The women we can all blame that I even went to Blissdom, Melissa and The Nester who peer pressured me into going.

you can take up your complaints with them.

As I was driving home from the airport last night, my 2 year old son called me crying and saying “I need you, mama”. I couldn’t wait to get home. To the little ones who tackled me before I even got out of the car. To the husband who was so excited and supportive of my time away and kept things together here at home (other than the washing machine I need to replace today). To my home where I kicked my heels off, grabbed some frozen pizza, curled up on the couch and watched some football, and felt as comfortable as ever.