We recently started to do something new each night around the dinner table. The kids are still young and we all eat dinner together every night, just as I did when I was growing up at home with my parents. It’s important to me that no matter if someone has a busy schedule or the kids don’t like what I made that we still all sit together as a family and for that sliver of the day, spend that time to come together away from the crazy of it all to be in the same space to listen and to share.

In an effort to make the moments at the table a little bit less about whining about what is in the dinner I made that picky mouths don’t like and a little more about family time, I started asking my kids, “what was the best thing about your day today?” And they loved sharing little things that I might not otherwise have heard about – “My best friend laughed at my joke at lunch!” or “When you jumped on the hay bales with me!”

One evening, my question was answered with silence. My daughter couldn’t think of anything, but she did say “I can tell you the worst thing that happened to me today!” and she told us about the boy a grade above her in school who pointed and laughed at her in the lunchroom the day after the 49ers vs. Giants game when she wore her 49ers shirt to school in an effort to show she loves her team even when they lose. Tears came to her eyes as she recounted the older boy mocking her.

We talked about it, about how mean people can be. About how we love ourselves no matter what anyone else thinks.

Thus was born the nightly ritual of not only sharing the best part of each of our days – it’s easy to be grateful for the good stuff – but also each of us have begun to share the worst thing that happened to us each day.

Tonight, it went as such:

7 year old girl:
Best thing – playing on the playground
Worst thing – A boy hitting another boy in the pick up line at school

5 year old boy:
Best thing – Getting pirate treasure at school
Worst thing – A boy taking off his pirate costume at school

Hubby:
Best thing – coming home to his smiling family after work
Worst thing – finding out a friend has cancer

Me:
Best thing – nabbing a pair of 7 for all Mankind jeans at Goodwill for $5
Worst thing – going outside to play with my son this afternoon together and having our yard swarmed by other kids, leaving no quiet for me and my boy

The thing about this exercise is that usually, it brings about a whole lot of gratitude. My hubby and I say to each other often when one of us is complaining about something silly.”If that is the worst thing that happens today, life is pretty good.” And it’s usually true. And while it can seem like our lives are reduced to play time and bargains, sometimes it’s those little things that matter the most and can make or break the day. There is nothing better than looking back on a day well spent and realizing that even with the “bad”, life is still really good.

Yesterday, I was honored to have been invited by Melissa at 320 Sycamore – one of my favorite blogs – to share my favorite things. You can find them here. While you are there – you have to also check out her kitchen remodel. But her post today is just awesome – you want diy reality?. I love seeing the real of our homes and lives. I always feel like I am the only one with insane messes all around my house while everyone else has a home ready for a photoshoot at any second.

Speaking of messy – I am at Simple Mom today sharing about The Messy Table.

Happy Wednesday!

Do you remember last year’s Christmas of Yes?

I’m doing it again.

It is December 5th. My house is decorated, meaning my kids put up the fake tree that I bought for $11 5 years ago and say every year that I will get rid of it this year and we’ll get a new real or at least big tree but still haven’t done it. Every year, the kids take that ratty little tree out and they put the ornaments they made in preschool on there and some lights and some shiny balls and their eyes are full of wonder. And so a newer, bigger, real-er tree will have to wait.

We also strung up some white lights in the living room. I love sitting in there at night or early in the morning with my coffee and just enjoying the quiet glow reminding me that it’s that magical time of year.

It is December 5th and I’ve finished my shopping. It’s easy when the list is small. Yet again, we’re doing 4 things each – something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read. They get Christmas jammies on Christmas eve and some art stuff in their stockings. And too much stuff from the grandmas and grandpas. And for the next 20 days I don’t have to think about “do I have enough stuff for them?” Of course I do. It’s not about the stuff. I will enjoy wrapping the gifts that I know they’ll love instead of a bunch of junk that they’ll forget about 32 seconds after they open it.

We’ll make cookies when they are out of school the week before Christmas. We’ll go to the Winter Wonderland and ice skate and pretend we’re not in Florida one day. We’ll read books and flip the tabs of the advent calendar and we’ll talk about the many things this time of year means other than what we’re going to get. It will be simple, plain, and wonderful.

I won’t do things I don’t want to just because I feel like I have to. We’ll stumble upon a new fun tradition by accident like we always do. That’s what happens when we let the season happen to us instead of forcing something out of it that isn’t real.

Yes, this will be the 2nd year of saying yes to the good stuff and spending these days soaking it all in rather than scrambling until it’s over and wondering how it went so fast.

We live half a mile from our grocery store, a nice shiny new-ish Publix. Pull out the driveway, turn left, make a right onto the main road and I barely have time to get going to speed limit before I have to slow down to pull into the parking lot. Because it’s so easy, I go often. Too often. To get one, two or five things. I’m lazy. And inefficient.

I decided that to motivate myself to be more efficient, if I needed five things or less, I was going to walk. This would make me think twice about what I really *need* at the grocery store, will motivate me to pay more attention to the contents of my cupboards and refrigerator and be more thorough when I do shop. And in the event I really do need 3 things, I’d get some fresh air and exercise.

Yesterday, the little guy and I headed out the door and down the sidewalk for our first adventure walking to the grocery store. He grabbed my hand, the way he always still does when we walk together. Tiny fingers weaving, clutching, reminding me he’s still little. His feet shuffled in his little boy way. He was a step behind all the way.

As we walked, he counted sidewalk squares, counted blocks we passed, complained he was hot, and we giggled at the critters on our path. We debated whether they were crickets or grasshoppers. He thinks they were grasshoppers because crickets only come out at night. He (wisely) shared that “grasshoppers are called grasshoppers because they hop over grass!” then told me jokes, “Why did the grasshopper cross the sidewalk? To get to the grass!” Smart and funny.

We looked at the clouds. He found a giraffe. I noticed a fence that I’ve never seen before on the many times I’ve run past it. We talked about ditches, dirt, counted steps until we got to the light to cross the big road. Young and frantic about traffic still, he clutched my hand tighter, his shuffling feet began to run, and he kept up with me as we crossed. Then back to his pace, his slow pace full of wonder and joy about the little things in the world around him.

As we strolled up to the store entrance, he marveled that “We don’t even have to park! We can just walk right in” while looking up at me with a sense of triumph, like we knew something all those other people didn’t. He felt special.

The walk back went faster. We took the other side of the road that was shadier. We counted together. I had to stoop to hear his little boy voice when he tried to tell me about the things he was seeing, many for the first time even though we drive past every single day. We both spent that time seeing the world in a different way just by choosing to take the same route on foot. Slower. Quieter.

Magical, really.

Emily at Chatting at the Sky has started up Tuesdays Unwrapped, a place to breathe in the big, beautiful magical moments of the day that happen between the loads of laundry and dishes. The moments that make the most mundane of days worth it. Head over there and join in or just read and feel inspired to notice.

I found out earlier this week that a family member that we see probably a total of 5 days a year came to visit us last year for 2 days and then told someone else behind my back that we don’t seem very happy. I was assured it wasn’t some assessment of our true happiness, but more of an assessment of the things we do and don’t have and an errant conclusion as a result that we must be unhappy – because of the things we don’t have.

from pinterest

I’d be lying if I said it didn’t bother me. It really did. But given some time to think about it, I went from being upset about something someone who clearly sees happiness as something you attain with the gathering of stuff, status, size to being grateful for her – because even in her unkindness, she reminded me to think about it – to make sure that I am grateful for what I have, that I am happy with where and what my life is right now.

The timing could not have been better as we approach this day of Thanks Giving. I am more conscious than ever of making sure I look around me each day and appreciate what I have and think less about what I don’t. I will embrace the morning hugs, the legos strewn about, the dishes in the sink, the clothes on the floor. For all those things mean that right now we have each other, we have fun, we have food, and we have comfort. We have far more than we need.

Happy Thanksgiving, Friends!

I haven’t picked up my camera today. I don’t have a fancy phone that lets me do neat things with the pictures I take. So, there is just this – from my cell phone on my run this morning. I love mornings that my little guy goes to school. I drop him off downtown and run bridge to bridge and back along the water. Other people run by, we all say “good morning!” and I love watching the sailboats go by. It’s good to have things to look forward to. Simple little things.

It’s been a while since I wrote on smarties and instant gratification. If you are allowed to have favorite posts of your own, then that is one of mine.

This pack of smarties was given to me by my 4 year old who was given them by a teacher and kindly handed them to me knowing they are my favorite. It’s been in my purse for weeks and I see it laying there in a side pocket every time I peek in to grab my keys or wallet. I carefully consider if I want them or not and thus far have said no. A weird thing for me, but it makes me smile each time knowing that I have gotten to a place that I truly can see something I like, know I will enjoy, but can still say no because I don’t want it or need it. I am sure the time will come that I will want them and that will be the time I say yes. I will enjoy them more that way, instead of just mindlessly consuming them because they are there.

A sure sign I’ve become much more mindful of all the choices I make when it comes to consuming, saying yes, and waiting until the time is right. There is so much more satisfaction that way, I think.

I like life with chickens, especially the part about eating yummy backyard eggs. I thought this would be one of those adventures my “can we have baby chicks PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE?!?!” daughter would get us started on and then she’d lose interest soon after. She has surprised me with the care and attention she gives to all 8 of them more than a year later, how much she loves bringing eggs in, and how much she still enjoys spending time with “the girls”. They all have names, they all have their own personalities, and the kids (still!) love them. As I type this, my sweet daughter is standing at the wall of french doors looking outside at them and telling me I have to come look because they are “so so cute”. I am glad the magic hasn’t worn off. I’m also glad someone else wants to hold them, because I don’t.

I was standing in a goodwill the other day, weighing options for my daughter’s summer (what people in other parts of the country call spring) wardrobe. Shorts, skirts, dresses, tshirts, sandals. So many cute things to choose from for a girl who needs some things that fit her body that won’t give up on growing. I know, I have many more years of this. Sometimes I can’t believe how fast it goes, though.

When I am shopping for her (and me!) at Goodwill, it can be so hard to limit myself. The prices are so right, the quality is almost always fantastic at my Goodwill so I don’t have to worry about buying a bunch of worn out junk that isn’t worth it. For $1.75 tshirts and $2 shorts, skirts and pants, I sometimes can find myself wanting to go overboard, especially when I find a slew of stuff someone just donated in one of my kid’s sizes (or mine).

Each time I have a cart full, or armloads, of clothes for them in their current or upcoming sizes, I remind myself of the laundry monster that lives at home. Each article of clothing, inexpensive as it may be, is one more thing that will fill the hamper, the washer, the dryer, and a laundry basket to be folded and put away. Too many cute things makes for one *really* big pile of laundry.

Granted, most of the time that I am there and searching racks, I have also dropped off my fair share of outgrown clothing. Not all the time though. And those times I have to remind myself before I add it to the buy pile that every item of clothing is another piece of laundry.

Every item for my home is another item to store, organize, dust.

No matter how good the deal is, I have to remind myself that there is only so much we *need*.

One of the big questions I ask myself when I am in a store and before I buy is “Would I replace this if it was ruined/broken/lost”. If the answer is no, I don’t *need* it, I just kind of want it or really want it. And then I can overthink from there.

Are you a shopping overthinker? Please tell me I am not the only one that stands in an aisle and does this every single time.

School got out early and it was a gorgeous sunny and breezy early afternoon. Hubby was off work early, too. We put on our swimsuits and packed up a beach bag off we went to play at the beach. I never want the ocean to blend into the background of our life here. I want to appreciate it as much as I can with these kids as they grow up. I don’t want to take for granted that we have a nature-made playground to go to on any sunny Wednesday.

Afternoons like these are why we’ve made the choices we have to be here and live this life for almost 5 years now. For more family time, to spontaneously say yes to the things that matter, to soak up all the beauty of a March afternoon at the beach together.

I often have doubts – in the midst of everyday life and the pull of what “should” be, I question if we’re doing it right. If I should be doing more, earning more, putting other things first. Days like this remind me that this is why our family has chosen this path for us right now. So I can be here, with them, doing things like this. I will never look back and wish I’d been somewhere else that day.