We had company over the weekend. With open arms, we welcomed a member of our family that hasn’t seen us or our kids in 3 years. They are 6 and 3 – yes, it was too long. The anticipation we felt with the visit looming was great. I made our home as welcoming as I was able. We wanted nothing more than to share this slice of life that is ours – the home we have created and are still creating, the kids who are non-stop entertainment, and this beautiful place where we live with white sandy beaches, tourists galore, and 90 degree days with leaves on the ground.
I was so excited.
It all started off well enough. Hugs, comments on how much everyone has grown, a house tour, followed by these Simple Perfect Enchiladas for dinner.
Time went on. Little comments came. Things about the details on the house. Not every last piece of trim is in place. But it’s a pretty nice place if you ask me. Yet instead of focusing on the good, the little stuff got mentioned. Criticized. Sometimes that is the way people are. The next morning came and coffee was made. We don’t have a coffee maker, but instead use a french press. Our coffee maker died, we chose not to replace it and we’ve loved the french press ever since. It’s simple, it’s not electronic, it can’t break. It works for us. There was nothing wrong with the coffee. It was the looks of only having coffee to serve from that and suddenly we were being scrutinized as too frugal. Like the only reason we could possibly not have a coffee maker made in China and bought at Target is because we can’t afford one. Not because we choose not to have one. And so a new coffee maker was bought for us. One we don’t want or need and one we haven’t used since Sunday morning when we made appropriate coffee.
I realized things were going downhill fast. Suddenly the only conversations were about what we have and do. It was all about money. I was getting uncomfortable quickly. Were the nice things we have in our home gifts? Who paid for them? How did we pay for them? Why don’t we have certain things? We don’t have much stuff. I try to buy quality when we do buy something. We don’t just drop into box stores and drop paychecks off.
All the weekend had to be was a simple one of pancakes and sandy beaches but instead it became about what we have or don’t have. What someone else perceived us as “needing” and making us feel like by going without we were depriving ourselves, our children of a better life.
This life is pretty good, if you ask me. I stay home with my kids (another point of contention brought up), my husband is home by mid afternoon for bike rides, pushing kids on the swings and evenings playing with and enjoying his family while I make dinner and prepare for the next day. I know everyone does different things for different reasons. I had become very comfortable with what we have, who we are and the choices we make. I was simply taken off guard and suddenly felt the need to defend what is ours that we have fought so hard for and built so purposefully for ourselves.
I took it all personally. I still am.
I have been in a funk and reeling since the visit ended. I have been awash in self doubt. I have been angry and defensive. I have wondered if it’s all true. If what we have going here isn’t enough. If we are somehow failing ourselves and our kids by not buying into the whole appearances matter and stuff matters and labels matter. Did I mention all the labels in our home got analyzed? Yes, really.
It was disorienting and saddening.
I still don’t know what to do with it all but I do know this. I know that it is so important for all of us, no matter what, to be accepting. Accept other life choices, other places in life, other situations. Love that there is something out there – a way, a path – for all of us. And that there is so much more in this world that matters than how much something cost or where something came from or what your zip code is. The saddest part is that so much attention got paid to things that don’t matter, the big stuff got missed out on. There were people here, willing and able to provide a beautiful, simple, relaxing weekend full of love and laughter and instead it was spoiled by the material. Stuff you can’t take with you. The important stuff faded into the background.
What would you have done?
Oh my goodness. I don’t know what I would have done. Probably been miserable and beat myself up over it for days to come. Sadly.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. You have something so much great than material things. I think your home is absolutely amazing though. You and your husband have worked so hard and you’ve created a beautiful retreat for your family. There will always be things that need doing. No matter how perfect your guests think their own house must be, I’m certain there’s a leaky faucet or nicked paint somewhere.
Try not to take it personally. There are those who are just plain miserable and they bring everyone down around them. Be happy you only had to use the coffee pot till Sunday. Maybe you can return it!
You’ve got things in your life in perspective, don’t allow self-doubt in.
Hugs to you.
-FringeGirl
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I would have been irritated too, and probably explained that I don’t WANT that stuff and am happy as is. And probably I would not invite them back, and would donate the coffee maker. Try not to let the things they said get to you any further.
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I probably would have reacted by being really defensive!
I’m guessing your guests don’t read your blog, eh?
Sometimes people grow apart based on the lives they choose for themselves. You’ve made good choices for your family. Go back and read your blog for some validation! You were criticized because your lifestyle made them question the choices that they’ve made. Donate that coffee maker and tax that tax deduction, send them a link to a french press at Starbucks and move on.
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Oh man. I don’t know what to say, except that I know how you feel, and I’m sending you lots of love right now.
Tara
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Wow. I’m sorry this happened to you on what should have been a very happy occasion. I agree with Susan. Sometimes people change in different ways. Maybe these people just haven’t reached the same conclusions you have. Their own mindset is all they have for now. But be patient (once you have the irritation under control). One day soon, they may find your way isn’t so bad. This happened to me.
I used to snicker at my hippie landlords who didn’t want people to use bleach in the washer or chemical pesticides to kill bugs. Fast forward three years later. Now I am the ‘no bleach’ Nazi. I have totally removed the toxic chemicals from our cupboards and we have made all sort of green/hippie/crunchy/what-have-you changes. People get confused by all our trash sorting rules: we compost, recycle, and trash as little as possible. We just tell them to put it on the counter and we’ll take care of it. One of these days, they may come around. Or not.
But you have people who see it your way, so please don’t feel bad.
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Sad that they are missing out on the bigger picture of life. Don’t doubt yourself, or your choices. Some people live their entire lives focused on material things. What a wasted life that is.
Be proud of the choices you have made, and who you are as a family. The best gift ever is being able to stay home w/your kids. That is something no material possession could ever replace, and I’m sure your kids would much rather have you home than have a home filled with fancy things.
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Wow. It’s interesting because whenever I read your blog I always come away with a positive spin.
I am so sorry that a weekend you were looking forward to was ruined by materialism and people who are obviously not happy with their lives they have to take others down.
We use a french press for our coffee although we do have an espresso maker too. My family doesn’t understand but they don’t live here every day.
Good luck to you and I agree with Susan. There are people reading you that like you for you. Go hug your kids and take a walk on your glorious sandy beaches!
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I would probably come away feeling bad, like you are.
But please, please don’t let it bring you down! You know what’s really important-it’s people and relationships, your loved ones. In the end it’s all that really matters!
(((Hugs)))
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I probably would have gotten upset, vented a little bit with my husband, and the smiled my way through the rest of the weekend. And then after my visitor had left I would have written a blog post about it and asked other people for advice.
Wait a minute…
It’s hard, but focus on the positive. You and your family are happy, and that’s what matters. Take a little time away indulging in all the things you love about your life, and you’ll get back on track quickly.
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I am so sorry that happened! I really hate that you were looking forward to the visit and it ended up being such a bummer. One thing that I found funny though when I was reading your blog today was that I thought french press coffee was fancier than coffee pot coffee? When I worked at Starbucks, a french press cost about double that of a cup of brewed coffee. SO, in fact you were doing something fancy shmancy they didn’t pick up on!
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What a shame that a guest in YOUR home tried to make you feel like a failure. Being there with your kids is so much more important than THINGS! It is so rude for them to make you feel bad for the choices you have made. Remember the post about the tote you made your daughter and how thrilled she was that you made it for HER? Those are the rewards of your choices. And you are right–the visit was supposed to be about people and relating, not showing off possessions.
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I’m always impressed by anyone who uses a French Press! I always messed mine up when I tried it. :> I would have thought you were rolling out the red carpet for me!
Seriously, so sorry about the weekend. I only recently added your blog to my reader and already look forward to it.
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Clearly your relative knows nothing about coffee. The French press is by far the best way to make coffee. I’m not just talking about simplicity. I’m talking about taste. It’s the way snooty coffee connoisseurs make it. When i worked as a barista, we’d use a commercial machine that would make a LOT of coffee at a time for the customers, but when we taste tested it ourselves we’d ALWAYS use the press pot. With the press pot you can brew the coffee with a coarser grind so less oils are released from the beans into the water. The oils give coffee a bitter flavor. Brew the same coffee beans in a press pot on a coarse grind and in a coffee machine on a fine grind side by side and you’ll notice the press pot coffee tastes WAY better. It’s so smooth and the bitter flavor is gone. Once we bought our press pot years ago we never used our coffee maker again, and we converted our parents too.
All this to say, I would be SO FRICKIN PISSED if a relative of mine bought me a stupid made in china bought at target coffee maker when we have THE top of the line press pot. HOW RUDE!
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Santhi Reply:
September 16th, 2010 at 6:05 am
I love the way you put that reaction to the rude guest ‘trying’ to be helpful ;p
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I had to giggle a little over the coffeemaker as we had guests purchase one for us as well. They had a better reason, though, since our (large!) french press did not keep up with their very high coffee consumption!
I hate it when people point out all the negatives… or things that THEY perceive as negatives. I, too, am usually happy with my home and choices… but sometimes someone seems to feel the need to point out the negatives. Not helpful!
Of course, sometimes that someone is me. *sigh*
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Even though this totally isn’t the point of your post: the French Press (while cheaper to obtain in some cases then an electric coffee maker) is THE best way to make coffee. It is widely recognized as better tasting coffee. But anyway- I am so sorry that happened to you but I am sure you handled it with grace & I KNOW you have a clearer picture of what is truly important in life that your ‘friends” clearly lack. Chin up- when they are still working at 75 to pay for all those labels in their house you’ll be 10+ years into a FABULOUS retirement! Love you & you inspire me to live more simply!
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I would have called them on it each time until they stopped. I would have asked: Why does that matter? If they asked about cost, I would have told them that it was rude to ask and none of their business.
I have done exactly this to a couple I know. It made them stop and think about how they were acting.
In the end remember (one of my favorite quotes) No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. – Eleanor Roosevelt
By the way, we roast our own coffee beans, grind them fresh each morning and prepare our coffee in a French Press. Not because we ‘can’t afford’ an automatic drip coffee maker but because French Pressed coffee is the best way known to prepare coffee. (Obviously, they don’t know much about coffee.)
Say a prayer for your friends. They are the ones that don’t realize the important things in life aren’t things.
Deborah
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At first I would have been upset (and I was upset for you!) but then you got to the part about the French Press, and I had to laugh. I agree with everyone else: foodies use press pots and they are the best way to drink–and appreciate–coffee. At that at that point, I would have realized that these people are nice and well-intentioned, but total lemmings afraid of being different. There are certain people who need to subscribe to the majority opinion (group think) in order to feel validated. Simplicity is a concept ahead of its time in our culture, but not for much longer.
Still, I might have been tempted to replace my sugar bowl with salt, since they’re into coffee and all.
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Some people hate no matter what. I’ve discovered you can’t change these people (they have to change themselves). It’s best to limit your exposure to them. It’s especially tough when it’s family, I know.
As for lifestyle, we’ve spent too long in the shadow of the 80′s where the goal was to make as much money as possible at any cost. What was lost was that we should also “live” and have something more to show for it than a bank account and stuff.
I’m a stay at home dad. We could be doing so much better financially if I was working. But our lives wouldn’t be better. There’s something irreplaceable about being there for the kids and watching them grow first-hand. Time can’t be replaced.
Don’t worry about what others negatively criticize you for. Heck, from what I see and read from you I wish we could live more like you guys!
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I would have been annoyed – truly. Here you are welcoming them into your home and they behave themselves like THAT? It’s honestly really rude and without much tact. There would have been much eye rolling between me and my husband for the duration of the visit if that took place at our house! :0
So sorry, my dear – but take heart that SO many people do relate to and are inspired by your way of life (I’m one of them!):) Don’t second guess your sweet little self any longer – and don’t let the memory of their time with you rob you of any more joy.
They are most likely never satisfied with their own life (always seeking and striving on the next this or that) and in some way probably were subtly trying to make themselves feel good about their own choices by putting yours down. Very junior high if you ask me.
I think you’ve built a lovely home and life – own it, live it, LOVE it!
You ROCK, EMILY!!
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Totally agree with everyone else: french press is THE way to enjoy coffee. We too have a drip pot and an espresso machine, but our favorite is the press pot.
As for the rest, I can’t imagine 1) thinking that way much less 2) having the audacity to say it. It sounds as though they’re not really all that happy with the way their lives have turned out, and are questioning their own choices.
Sad for them, and for you. I’m sorry it happened like that. I’m sure it had to hurt.
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i always amaze myself when i let one person affect the way i feel about my whole life or one of my life choices (like homeschooling) when so many others (others who mean much more to me), support my choices. don’t let someone make you second guess yourself or what you know you’re doing for the right reasons. you love your life and you have created a beautiful life with your lovely family. that’s what matters.
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so sorry this happened to you..why do relatives do this to us. But it is reassuring when you say the ‘important stuff faded into the background’ because it proves you still havent lost sight of what the important bits are. Everytime i read of your life, I envy it and am inspired to carve out a similar one for myself.
and french press coffee is the gourmet way to go..did you know that any other way leads to a loss of the aromatic oils?
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I am sorry that an anticipated family member made you feel such and not appreciating your warm hospitality. I would have been consumed by self-doubt too but understanding I know better (how liberating simple and frugal living really is) and its a life i have made for myself will be my consolation. Your affirmation about your good life and how your choices are good for your own family really should make you stronger. If anything, its just reminder that we cannot impose our choices and views on others.
Depending how close this family is, I may have bitten off the person’s head ;o/ preached the merits of frugal and quality living or just grinned my way thru and never want to invite this person for an extended stay. Then again, being family, we always have to put up with one another’s idiosyncrasies! ;o
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People who don’t understand a difference will often find fault instead of learning about the ‘why’ behind the difference.
We all make our choices in life based on our own values, wants, needs and often – our faith. This can cause for a lot of disconnect and even those who ‘mean well’ can be very hurtful.
I’m sorry your weekend was not as you anticipated – full of laughter, beach sand and pancakes. I bet most of us would LOVE a weekend like that!
I love following your journey, I think your house is awesome and can very often feel the love of your home/family in your posts. That last part is the most important. Kids remember love… not stuff.
Blessings on the journey~
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I would of been holding my tongue all weekend; I’m sorry this person made you feel like this Emily.
I’ve had/have a lot of these issues with my mum over this type of thing; unfortunately we are not very close and she sees my lifestyle as one of deprivation and makes, sometimes nasty, comments; I rise above them most of the time as I know it’s her with the problem not me. x
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That’s really unfortunate. I’m sorry that what you hoped would be a restful, meaningful weekend ended up being a so negative. It’s sad when people are so performance- and status-oriented. I have the “joy” of being related to some people like that too, and honestly in my family it was tragic and relationships were destroyed. It can seem like a “little thing” but these attitudes are potentially lethal to true and real relationships.
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I too spent earlier this week in a fog of self doubt over whether or not to join a homeschool coop. Yes, it might have been fun and yes it might be a good thing. However, it is not part of the vision that God has given to us for our family and would not be good for our family as a whole. And my emotional self took 2 days of praying for God’s Wisdom and contentment to come to peace with the decision. I pray that God will also give you His peace over these matters.
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I feel your pain. My family is the same way every time they come to my house. My husband and I are waiting to have kids (we are 26 & 27) and instead have two beautiful dogs. We don’t have cable or a huge flat screen HDTV. Our house is forever a work in progress. Yet every time family comes to visit, they focus on all the things we’re “missing out on.” My husband and I (and our furry children) are very happy. My point is, don’t get down on yourself. Life is only what you make it. Let them critisize your lifestyle; you are the only ones who have to live it. My thought is that they are jealous of the time you get to spend as a family. Too many families never see eachother because mom and dad are working two jobs each to “keep up with the Jones.” You can’t get that time back.
I love your blog and I am inspired each time I read it, to continue living my life with less stuff and more meaning!
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I am sorry the visit was a disappointment and that your friends are in such a different place with their values. Just keep reminding yourself of these words you wrote:
“The way we see it, we can either look around at what we don’t have in terms of money, stuff, or a big house and be disappointed or feel deprived. Or we can see what we do have – a comfortable home for our family, time together, and an appreciation for all the things we used to miss when life was more fast-paced and seemingly flying by as we flailed to keep up with payments and bills and work schedules. I know none of us will look back and wish we’d spent more time at work but we will be glad for all the time we had to spend as a family because of the choices and sacrifices we are making now.”
You have taught me a lot over the past year I have been reading your blog. I have really begun to appreciate the things I do have even if at one time they didn’t feel good enough to me. I now know I have everything I could ever want and it has nothing to do with the things I own! Perhaps you had some influence on your guests and they will eventually see what is really important in the scheme of things. Hugs to you!
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well, seeing that I’m going through a VERY similar situation at the moment, I know exactly what I’d do.
First, I’d cry b/c it hurts when people (especially relatives) don’t seem to accept you.
Then, I’d cry out to God for help – b/c only He knows how to love the unlovely, and I need a lesson.
And, then after seeing them through God’s eyes, I’d forgive them….b/c clearly this was all about their own issues that have not been dealt with. And that is not something I can fix, only God can.
So, I’ll pray for them now that I know how much they need it
And, I’ll ask God for wisdom to set some boundaries so that they don’t have the freedom to come over every day with their toxic attitudes. and I’ll ask for wisdom to know how to love them even when they’re “stinky.”
and in the end, I’ll realize that it all happened so that God could teach me something….and in my case, He’s teaching me a lot. I hope you can learn from this, too.
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I am angry about this post. My mother died just after my fifth birthday, and my father just after I turned twelve. I would still, four decades on, give ANYTHING to go back and be able to have what you two are giving your kids. It is not about money, fancy houses and clothes. It is about having time for them. Being there. If you want to, you can return to work later on. That will be your choice. You and your children will never have this precious time again. YOU ARE RIGHT. THEY ARE WRONG.
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I’m so sorry you had to endure an entire weekend of criticism. How stressful and disappointing, especially when you were so looking forward to spending time with family. If it’s any consolation, I’m very familiar with this situation and the self-doubt that can creep in when it occurs.
My husband works part time and I have flexible hours at my job so we don’t have to put our son in daycare. He’s involved in one afterschool activity instead of having a jam-packed schedule. And I love the simplicity of my very pared down wardrobe and our comfortable little house.
My mother and sister, on the other hand, are both champion shoppers. They have big, lovely homes filled to the top with lovely things…and I can’t imagine living in either of them. I see them weekly so there are lots of opportunities for small “digs” about our family’s life choices rather than one big upsetting weekend, but the feeling I’m left with after one of those you-mean-you-don’t-have-an-entire-set-of-”good”-dishes-for-special-occasions type of discussions is very much the same.
In the end, all I can do is look at how happy, secure and well-adjusted my son is and know we’re doing the right thing for us. That’s all that counts.
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OH man. I’m sorry. I know a little of this feeling, of spending time with loved ones who view things so differently. Funny, I grew up with plenty of money, and my husband not so much, but my family is the frugal one and his wants to buy my kids everything under the sun when we are together. And they eat out every.single.meal. It makes me feel uncomfortable and I don’t want my kids to think they can have whatever tickles their latest fancy. Plus we don’t need so. much. stuff. It’s all I can do to keep closets cleaned out and the stuff we do have organized. It’s difficult to accept gifts when you know the givers are buying themselves into poverty.
I think sometimes when we make different choices, others feel judged indirectly because our choice makes them question theirs. Maybe this is a little of what happened to you? Or maybe you can at least think of it that way and not take their actions personally? Hugs. Family is tricky, no?
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Oh, I hate it when people act like that! My husband and I recently bought our first home, and we have furniture from our parents, thrift stores, and garage sales! We cannot afford to buy everything brand new! I have friends that will come visit and say things about it, even tell me about a ‘sale’ that some expensive retail store is having. I always hate it because I do put a lot of pride in my home, especially when I have people coming to visit. I am so sorry that you had to deal with this!
I too would just ask for God’s encouragement so i wouldn’t turn into a nasty person when they are around. I would either start saying mean comments back to them, or I would just sit there and cry about it later. I guess it just depends on the day.
I think your house is beautiful- and you guys have done an amazing job on everything! We also use a french press, the coffee is so much better!
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Wow – what a tough weekend. Now you know why you haven’t seen them in three years. First of all, it almost sounds like jealously was the motivation behind most of this. I mean, why would someone fault you for staying home with your kids if you can swing it? Most moms would love that! Secondly, it takes someone with an open mind to accept that people have different lifestyles, and they have to do what works for them. You are doing what is right for you and your family, and they will just have to accept that.
Feel sorry for them – and send them a link to your blog.
Hugs!!
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Tracy Reply:
September 16th, 2010 at 11:35 am
I totally agree with Ellie.Feel sad for them because maybe they don’t see what is important in life. But I think you are doing a good job,by what I read in your blogs.Cheer up, smile move on.There is always negative people trying to pull you down but we can take it to heart or just ignore it.God Bless and hope you feel better soon.
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Next time make them stay in a hotel. Don’t put yourself through the heartache.
I politely put it in the cupboard and there it waits.
I adore my french press. My step father-in-law does not. A while back he brought over instant coffee to leave at my house so when they are here he can have his nasty coffee.
I love reading your blog. The choices you have made for your life are for you and your family. Enjoy them and don’t second guess them unless prompted from within.
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Sometimes it can be disappointing to get to know someone better. My heart aches for people that are so focused on how the outside looks instead of how the inside feels. They miss the good stuff.
Our kids don’t need things, they need us. Your children are blessed to have parents who are truly present.
And I will take coffee any way I can get it.
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Such good advice from everyone! I heartily agree! Keep in mind that your relative may not have realized the impact of the words that were spoken and it may sink in later when they have had time to reflect. Don’t take it to heart. Learn what you need to learn form the experience and then let it go.
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After such a rough weekend, isn’t it great to know that each and every one of your readers appreciates you and your talent that you share with us everyday! You have a wonderful home that would make anyone comfortable. And about the small things that aren’t perfect, not everyone wants to live in a cookie cutter home built in 2010 with builder white walls and rooms full of expensive furniture. The thing I love about cottages and homes with experience in their walls is that they have such a personality and great stories behind them.
I wouldn’t let this get you down any longer. You are a great person with a wonderful talent, and if your whole family is together everyday by the afternoon, you might have the luckiest family around. So many people work and work and work and spend and spend and spend, and they forget to enjoy the small things that really matter. I hope one day my husband and I can be so lucky to spend all that wonderful time together.
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I suspect your guests are insecure about themselves. Insecure people tend to see other different choices as an attack on them. (“Oh, so you do X? Well, I do Y. I suppose you think I should X too. Well, let me tell you, Y is the best choice ever.”
Diffuse the argument. “So I got my furniture on craigslist. Why do you care? This isn’t about you.”
As for the “depriving your children” argument, there is an easy comeback. “Tell me everything you remember about the furniture your parents had and the car they drove when you were 6 years old.”
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Perhaps three years wasn’t long enough!
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So sorry!
I hope you are getting past this some by now. Forgive them, pray for them, let God work out the details and keep living your life the best way you know how regardless of what they think!
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Oh man, I was under the impression that it was a good visit! Stuff like that bothers me a lot. Sometimes I’ll even think people are judging me and my financial decisions when they probably aren’t. For me, it probably stems from the fact that I’m really not 100% content with things, even if I try and convince myself that I am.
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Emily, what a bummer situation! I don’t understand why they would not embrace your simple way of living. You have something money cannot buy – quality time with your family! I think a lot of people measure success by “stuff”. (They are probably not debt free either)Hang in there, you’re doing it the RIGHT way! And your kids will love you all the more for it!
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Hi, I found your blog through a google search one day when I was trying to figure out how to simplify my life.
The way you and your family live is admirable. I am striving to do the same. I don’t need these labels. My 2 dollar tank top is just as good as their 50 dollar tank top. My 30 cent box of walmart brand mac and cheese is just as good as kraft. I took my car full of things to goodwill, and i can breathe easier in this clutter free environment.
A good friend of mine passed away a few days ago. She was only 19 and taken by cancer. Now, more than ever, I realize it is people and experiences that we need to fill our lives with, rather than filling our homes with unimportant materialistic things.
I would have tried to be respectful to this family member, but I probably would have cracked in the end and told them all of that. I admire you for keeping your cool.
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I have to tell you, I strive to live how you do! Simply…beautifully. Your blog inspires me and it obviously inspires many others. I know the comments that hurt the worst come from those close to us – family, friends, etc. – but just know that you are providing your children a BETTER life this way. And you said it best when you said “Stuff you can’t take with you.” What a timely truth. …and we have a coffee press, too, by the way. It’s the best-tasting coffee I’ve ever had AND no waste!
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Wow… I actually have family members like that, too. Sometimes all people can do is focus on the negative. I’m sorry you’ve gone through this. Hold onto your pride and don’t let them get to you.
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Wow. I am annoyed with that experience just by reading it! I am not sure I would have been able to hide my annoyance as well as you did. And my husband certainly wouldn’t have stood for it. He most likely would have called our guests out, haha! It’s funny…but the french press is almost a metaphor for the way you’ve chosen to live your life. It’s basic and simple, but brings out all those essential oils in coffee that make the flavor really stand out. You chose to live an simple, uncomplicated life, and savor all the small things. Like french-pressed coffee, some people just don’t get it. It’s even more unfortunate when these people are members of the family. Give yourself a couple days to vent and recuperate and forget about it! You have so much more to be thankful for and your kids will grow up appreciating things so much more!
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Wow! I would have told them they have obviously never had coffee from the french press- it is soo much better! We have started using our daily because it doesn’t taste good to me from the coffee pot anymore.
We recently visited some relatives who just finished building their “off-grid green” house, we were in awe of everything (I mean they did it slowly-themselves) but I could see how materialistic people wouldn’t be impressed. I love seeing your home and all the simplicity!
I was just reminded of something else…A few years ago we didn’t have a salt shaker, we only used sea salt and we would just take the big container to the table when we needed it. Everytime my mom would come to dinner she would make the biggest deal about the salt, EVERYTIME!! It wasn’t that we couldn’t afford to spend $1 on a salt shaker, but it wasn’t really necessary, and we never thought about it when we were at the store, and we never put it on the list because we didn’t feel we needed it. Of course eventually my mom bought us a salt shaker so all is right in the world
but it jus shows how somethings are important to some people but not to others. (Of course most of the time we can’t find the salt shaker and still use the big container!)
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oh wow. what a tough situation. how did you handle it face to face? I may have wanted to ask them to leave. Emily, please don’t discount your choices. You have and continue to make very wise choices with the way you live your life. They are the ones missing out onlife. Kick those negative feelings to the curb and know that you are far beyond rich in my eyes : )
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