Comments on: It’s Not a Competition

By: ksdecd9801

ksdecd9801 — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 03:51:06 +0000

I don’t usually leave a comment, but your post could have been written by me! I agree with all of my being that you must be happy with who you are. I live in a neighborhood that is filled with competition and it has taken me so long to just STOP and focus on keeping my family happy and not compare ourselves with others. Just be true to yourself and to let your children know that they will fail and it will make them stronger as a person. I love your blog,you do a great job!

By: Jen

Jen — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 23:41:11 +0000

Thank you for sharing your experiences – it is nice to see that others face similar challenges. I have three children — 4,6,9 — and the six-year-old has been making everything a competition for nearly a year. Like you, I try to emphasize that “learning” and “trying” and “doing your best” are much more important than winning. It seems to fall on deaf ears, but I hope as he matures he will understand.

By: One step at a time « This Thrifted Life

One step at a time « This Thrifted Life — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 19:49:14 +0000

[...] 19, 2010 Emily over at Remodeling My Life wrote a great post the other day about how often we view life as a competition–even when we’re striving [...]

By: Alana @ Gray Matters

Alana @ Gray Matters — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 18:57:54 +0000

Loved this post, Emily. I haven’t blogged in months because every time I read through my reader there was someone doing it better. I finally got a grip and remembered why I started blogging in the first place, not to compete with anyone else, but document my life – the good, the bad and the ugly.
.-= Alana @ Gray Matters´s last blog ..The Way I Roll =-.

By: Sara

Sara — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 02:27:53 +0000

Oh this is my daughter too! She is 8 and her brother is 4 and she does everything better than him, and as a result he just wants to hang around her the entire time…. he follows her, he copies her, she imitates her. I am trying to get my son to understand that he is different to her, he is a boy for example, he is 4 for example….. but for the minute I guess that is just where he is at. But I will look at ways of focusing on his strengths and encourage himself out of himself.
Your daughter looks so cute…
Sara (Sydney)

By: Emily

Emily — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 02:23:43 +0000

Terri, you are right, it is hard to know. But we each know in our hearts which one we are. I want to work on me, and make sure my motivations are true to me.

By: Nancy

Nancy — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 15:04:06 +0000

I absolutely love this post. So true. So hard to not fall into the compettion trap. I find myself really needing to practice what I preach to my kids A LOT lately. This is one of those issues. Thanks so much for the reminder... God has graced me with so many blessings. I need to be grateful for who I am right now at this moment. Thank you.. .-= Nancy´s last blog ..8 =-.

By: Terri

Terri — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 13:02:12 +0000

It’s so hard to know, though, what is drive to be better and what is overly competitive. Don’t you think?

By: Lisa

Lisa — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 01:09:17 +0000

My girls are twins and we recently had to end a friendship with good friends because their daughter was constantly “competing” with my kids, and the parents encouraged it in a way. For instance, if my kids got a birthday gift, their friend would show up with the same item a few days later, or one even “bigger and better”. It was very frustrating and trying for us as these were good friends of ours. The mom’s reaction when I broached the subject was “It’s hard for my daughter because your girls are twins and she can’t compete with that.” What? So she needs to one-up them in every other area because she isn’t a twin too?

We finally pulled our kids from all activities they did in conjunction with this child — as her constant one-upmanship was difficult for my kids to deal with at their age. It was a tough decision to make, but I am glad we did it as my kids are much calmer and interact with other kids on a much easier level as they don’t always have to be on guard.

By: paisley penguin

paisley penguin — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 18:46:52 +0000

My SD did the same thing to my SS. They are 16 months and we always warned her when she would beat him at running (or anything) that one day he would be bigger and she might not be the fastest. That day has come and her brother is better and faster than her at a lot of things. She has now stopped trying. Which is completely sad. We are trying to get he back on track, not to be better than her brother but her best.