This post first appeared here on March 19, 2009. I have thought about this post many times this week, as I struggle to let go of doing it all and instead, embrace doing a few things well.
I haven’t been in a very good place lately. Where I was once finding beauty, I’m now finding flaws. What I once thought was just right seems not good enough now. I blog about remodeling, change, improving things around me, and myself in the process. But when am I just going to be still and look around me and think that things are good enough? Don’t need changing or improving. That me, my home, my life are okay just as they are? I don’t know. Maybe all this remodel and change stuff just shows I am not as content as I often think I am. My life is simple and it absolutely is frugal. But if my heart isn’t there, maybe nothing really has changed. When the house projects are done, will I simply sit back and be happy with a mission completed and enjoy it as it is for years to come? Or will we just start improving on the improvements because it’s never just good enough? I may just not be cut out for being still and content, no matter how much I long to be.
Or my vision of what content is could be off. Seeing myself sipping lemonade on a sunday afternoon behind my humble home while my kids play and not ever seeing another thing that needs improving may just be the wrong expectation. Maybe what content is has more to do with being able to immerse myself in the process, enjoy each moment, whether those moments involve changing and improving or not. I am not perfect, nor will I ever be. All the improvement in the world won’t ever result in complete and perfect. I can just look at today and be content with what I am right. in. this. moment. For today, it’s good enough.
It seems I am not the only one with these thoughts on my mind. I have read some other wonderful posts on other blogs lately along the same lines. I hope you’ll read them as well.