remodeling this life

photo credit: kennymatic

I guess I am all about reflecting on all the great things in my life lately. I can’t help but look around me and feel an overwhelming sense of contentment and peace. I think about days in my life that have been far different than they are now – full of stuff, consuming and paying for things that I wouldn’t dream of doing myself. Now I consider my life to be full of do it yourself. Why pay for someone else to do it or make it when I can do it or make it myself, enjoy the process and appreciate the results?

My life has become more fulfilling because living frugally and simply has caused me to slow down, take the time to create, and make the time to do things for myself and my family that I never did before. I used to take for granted eating out, trips to the salon to get a cut and color, paying people to take care of things for me, buying cute things for my home instead of creating things myself.

Now, I think about those days and it’s hard not to feel wasteful and spoiled. It’s hard to think about how unhappy I was because I was unfufilled. Swiping a debit or credit card certainly doesn’t feel as good as making something myself. Things I never dreamt I would do are now part of my life and things that I find great pleasure from doing.

If you looked at my life a few years ago, I didn’t even bother to put a fresh flower in a vase. Now, I love planting seeds, watching them grow and cultivating a garden full of flowers and food. I never would’ve thought to spend an afternoon making crafts and decorations.  I took for granted the Targets and Dollar Stores and thought it was normal just to buy buy buy what I wanted wanted wanted. Now, when I see something I like, I think about how I can make it. Which is a beautiful thing because I can make it to my taste and have uniqueness that I love and can be proud of surrounding me.

A few short years ago, I felt entitled to dinner out after a long day, or lunch out with coworkers during a busy day. Now, I love home cooking and find relaxation in making meals from scratch, cooking well for my family and enjoying meals in my own comfortable home.

Then I could think about all the things I did to try to make myself look good. Those salon trips, the pedicures, the trips to the mall paying full retail for clothes that go out of style far too soon. Yes, that was me. Only now do I know that it isn’t about how much you spend and it’s not about being cheap and frumpy either. There are happy mediums to be found and I daresay that I have still found ways to look good and feel good without dropping the kind of money I did before.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I am more confident and happy with myself today than I have ever been. I am no longer looking for happiness in all the wrong places. I know it’s not found in house square footage or shiny gadgets. I know it has nothing to do with what I have and has everything to do with what I am. Choosing to live on less today has made me feel full of more. More love, more appreciation, more creativity, more peace, more time, more space.

If you told me 3 years ago that living a frugal and simple life would be anything but painful and deprived, I would have laughed. I never would’ve thought it would be this way. I never could’ve imagined that it would be this good. It’s so unexpected. And so welcome.