My Life, Downsized

October 13, 2008 at 8:00 am , by Emily

A reader, Denise, emailed me saying,

“Just found your website last week.  Love your posts.  Working to simplify our lives now – both in the area of finances as well as job/career choices.  You may have it listed in an earlier post, and if so, you can point me to that, but what things did you do initially to get started essentially downsizing from the chaos?  I’m ready to slow things down and just enjoy my kids – they’re 7 and 4, and do those little projects like painting their rooms that have been on hold now for over two years!  Love your remodeling pics – very inspiring.”

First of all, thank you, Denise, for your kind words and for your email asking about how to start on a path of simplifying and “downsizing from the chaos”.  I started this blog a little under a year ago, which was actually after we were well under way on our new life path. So it hasn’t all been documented as we went, but there is some backstory on how we got where we are and how this simpler life got started.

My About Page has a little background as well as these posts here:

What Happened To Me?

Being Debt Free Means I Can Live For Today

I’d also like to share this post from Small Notebook, Trading Down to a Smaller Home. While not about me and my family, it is a very good example of what I think most families go through and the shift in attitude that comes with the choice to downsize your life.

Once upon a time, I lived here
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All 2700sf with a huge basement, a garage, and 9 closets and an attic was mine. I loved that house. Still do. But things needed to change if I wanted to have the life I was seeking – to stay at home with my daughter and for my stay at home dad husband to go back to work. We lived in Western, NY and hubby hated the long gray winters. Lots of things were just not right for us there. We put the house on the market and it sold in about 2 weeks. Our adventure began and a few months later, we moved to Florida where we bought our fixer upper. With no garage, no basement, and hardly a closet to be found.

I realized quite quickly that I was going to have to make some changes to how I felt about my stuff. Not everything could stay. I no longer had sprawling rooms to spread out in. There was now a bedroom for everyone instead of extra bedrooms for “stuff”. And so, I started purging. Little by little, I took boxes and bags of things I had kept around mostly because I had the space to and not because those things were useful or even beautiful to me. They just were.

Through this transition, I began to see money differently. I saw myself selling or giving away so many things that I had spent money on, and often times A LOT of money on. But those things weren’t always the wisest of purchases. I had hobbies I thought I would take up, I had clothes I bought just because. Now, because I saw how much I consumed and essentially wasted, I am much more considerate when I am going to buy something. How long will it last? How much do I love it? Where will it go? What will I do with it? Every purchase has to have a purpose now because I never want to go back to the days of sorting through things that have been shoved away into boxes simply because they could.

This house has not always been wonderful. You know, it has looked like this before.

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More house transformation photos can be found on my House Remodel Photos page, plus posts about our Living Room Remodel, Kitchen Remodel, and my daughter’s Princess Room Makeover.

It’s been a long journey but this house and this life change has made me and my family think more about what we have. It has made us appreciate living a simple and small life. When you don’t have a lot of space to work with, little things count more. I now find myself appreciating the simple beauty of a cozy room full of charm and character that is comfortable and organized. I want people to come here and have a comfortable place to sit and talk. I want my kids to have a place they can grow up calling home, a place that they were part of building and making what it is today.

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The path that we all choose in an effort to simplify and downsize may look different from someone elses, but this is the path that is most authentic and right for us. Our goal was to make things easier, have more time as a family and to depend less on a paycheck to afford ourselves more time, energy and freedom. My hubby has a job that gets him home by 3 p.m. most days, which means he has a lot of time for his family. He doesn’t make a lot of money and there is no denying it’s not always easy, but when we think of the days and the times we have together, it has been the right choice for us today and one that has ultimately benefited us in many surprising ways. I doubt it will always be this way. Things will change, our children will grow up and enter school so our priorities and needs will change with that. But for today, it feels right and it works well for us.

The way we see it, we can either look around at what we don’t have in terms of money, stuff, or a big house and be disappointed or feel deprived. Or we can see what we do have – a comfortable home for our family, time together, and an appreciation for all the things we used to miss when life was more fast-paced and seemingly flying by as we flailed to keep up with payments and bills and work schedules. I know none of us will look back and wish we’d spent more time at work but we will be glad for all the time we had to spend as a family because of the choices and sacrifices we are making now.

25 Comments

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25 Comments so far

by Rachel

On October 13, 2008 at 11:05 am

I love the photo of your family! You summed up the process perfectly.

I especially relate to this line: “Every purchase has to have a purpose now because I never want to go back to the days of sorting through things that have been shoved away into boxes simply because they could.” =Awesome.

Thanks for including the link, this post is so inspiring!

Rachels last blog post..Hot Chocolate Recipe to Start the Season, and Other Favorite Drinks

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by Alana @ Gray Matters

On October 13, 2008 at 1:50 pm

Great post – your family is beautiful! I know the security your kids find in the home you’re building together is priceless. Before buying the house we’re in now (a few months ago) we talked very seriously about packing up and moving to Colorado – it would’ve meant a huge lifestyle change but in a lot of ways I was looking forward to the challenge. We were all set, but my husband got cold feet and was to afraid to move without a job. The reality of taking care of a family of five set in and he decided it wasn’t the right time for us. I still hope for the day when we can just suck it up and head west. I admire your courage and your willingness to share your journey.

Alana @ Gray Matterss last blog post..WFMW: Cheap Wall Art

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by Frugal Trenches

On October 13, 2008 at 2:28 pm

What a wonderful post Emily! It very much relates to what I wrote about yesterday & again today!
I spent several years on your side of the Atlantic and by the sounds of it not very far from where you used to live! I still occasionally miss watching Linda Pellegrino of W. NY news (can’t remember the name of the show she did!).

Frugal Trenchess last blog post..My little inspirations!

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by laura @ move to portugal

On October 13, 2008 at 2:44 pm

Beautiful post, beautiful family.

As someone who is a little older, notice I said little ;) , than you, I can only say from experience that working long hours to pay for a large house with all the trimmings, is never worth it!
I’m so glad that I discovered blogs like yours and Rachels, you have helped open my eyes
x

laura @ move to portugals last blog post..Relaxing Sunday

[Reply]

by On Simplicity » Blog Archive » Weekly Links

On October 13, 2008 at 3:09 pm

[...] at Remodeling This Life gives us some backstory on her path to simplicity in My Life, Downsized. I like her point here: “Every purchase has to have a purpose now because I never want to go [...]

by John

On October 13, 2008 at 4:49 pm

I have been living at half my previos income for 9 months now, only able to afford car/insurance, gas, and cigarettes with some spare change for a meal or two out of the house a month… But I don’t feel any different, any poorer, than I did when I could come home with new junk every few days. The only difference is that I spend less time cleaning and donating :D

[Reply]

by Denise

On October 13, 2008 at 4:58 pm

absolutely lovely post!

Denises last blog post..what could be next?

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by Vintage Mommy

On October 14, 2008 at 12:24 am

I’ve been wondering a lot lately about how we could change things around here. We won’t be moving anytime soon, so we’ll have to find another motivator to get rid of stuff. On my other blog (one bag nation) I talk about decluttering, getting more organized, etc. but it’s not really focused on simplicity per se . . . just wondering!

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by neimanmarxist

On October 14, 2008 at 4:07 am

what a great post emily! that house looks like a lot of the houses in our neighborhood :)

neimanmarxists last blog post..Frugal teenagers?

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by Marie

On October 15, 2008 at 1:53 pm

What a great post! I wish I had your courage. :o / It’s so hard to give up the “I WANTS”… I’m trying. I really am. Thanks for always putting things into perspective.

Maries last blog post..primitives, anyone?

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by le

On October 17, 2008 at 8:31 am

hello there … me again … we are on this road now I think … neither of us want to work the usual grind and I don’t see why we should have to choose to push one of us out there … I will enjoy the challenge of modifing my behaviour and see where it gets me :)

Thanks for sharing this – cheers le

les last blog post..Grass is Greener

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by PT

On October 18, 2008 at 5:39 pm

This was a great read, Emily. Good to get to know you a little more and more about your life philosophy. Thanks for sharing.

[Reply]

by I Cut the Cable PrimeTime QuickHits | Prime Time Money

On October 18, 2008 at 5:47 pm

[...] Week Purchase Real Estate Within Your Self-Directed IRA What we’re buying before our baby is born My Life: Downsized Dream More, Work [...]

by Dee

On October 18, 2008 at 8:58 pm

Hi, came via Le@third on the right.
Great advice you have given.

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by Frank

On October 20, 2008 at 10:31 am

Downsizing isn’t a dreaded activity, it can actually be fun. Reviewing my bills and realizing how much I can cut and not feel has been very stimulating for me.

Last evening my family and I built our first big fire and enjoyed the natural heat that a fireplace gives off ……

I love your blog

Frank

Franks last blog post..Frugal Ways to Reduce Your Wireless Telephone and Cable Television Expenses

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by Stacy

On January 8, 2009 at 8:13 am

Emily,
Your website has come in such handy over the last few weeeks since I found you via Simple Mom. Although today it wasn’t just handy, it was inspiring. One of those, you clicked here for a reason moments. Yesterday I purchased my version of your Florida home, next month I will end my career and my family will pack its belongings and move to Texas. The reason for our move is the same as yours- spending 45 minutes a day with my three children on the weekdays is not my version of raising my family. This move will allow me the opportunity to stay at home with my three beautiful children. My husband will take a job that pays much less and all in all we will have to learn to live on 1/3 of our former income. Still, he will be home by 3pm and I will no longer have to travel and miss the milestones as my children accomplish them. To make this move work, I will also have to downsize all the miscellaneous clutter my former life allowed me to accumulate. I feel comfort knowing I have made a wonderful friend and that you will be here to guide me along the way.

Thanks for giving me a little hope,
Yesterday it all seemed a little overwhelming, today I feel renewed and ready to start the life I choose

Stacy

Stacy´s last blog post..Find of the Day: Affordable Diaper Bag

[Reply]

by Finding Myself | Remodeling This Life

On January 8, 2009 at 10:02 am

[...] and how dramatically different from a few years ago. My family made a choice a few years ago to downsize. I didn’t necessarily come into this life skipping along with birds chirping on my shoulder, [...]

[...] a smaller house. If you have several unused rooms, consider going to a smaller house with a smaller payment and less [...]

[...] a smaller house. If you have several unused rooms, considergoing to a smaller house with a smaller payment and less [...]

[...] My Life, Downsized. Read about this family’s move to a smaller house and what they learned along the way. [...]

by Theresa

On July 13, 2009 at 3:12 am

Our family is having to move into a 2300 sq foot home (rental) after having lived in a 7000 sq foot home for 20 years! We had to foreclose and found we had to be out in six weeks. I have been selling as much as I can on Craigslist but have not been able to pack very well for small things. Luckily we are able to move some furniture items in early, but it is very hard on the kids motivating them to pack. We have now only a little over 2 weeks left, so it will be very stressful the last 2. It is challenging because I work so much as does my husband. I will miss our home terribly. The good thing is it is more central to stores where we are moving and housecleaning won’t take so long! I only get 1 week off from work to finish moving/clearing out junk from garage etc.! Feeling very panicky.

[Reply]

by Perfectly Imperfect | The Inspired Room

On July 21, 2009 at 1:36 pm

[...] blogs at Remodeling This Life about simple and frugal living. She downsized her life to move across the country and buy a fixer-upper with her husband, two kids, and two dogs. Emily [...]

by Recession Survivalist

On July 24, 2009 at 2:00 pm

Keep up the great work! This website is inspiring. Thank you

[Reply]

[...] My Life Downsized [...]

by Chris

On December 16, 2009 at 3:25 pm

Just out of curiosity, where in Western NY are you from? I grew up in Rochester, but have now escaped the winters and live in Virginia. Although I must say, I still miss the fall colors and the landscape.

[Reply]

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