Discovering Needs Through Elimination
For the past 10 days, I have been a girl in motion. I spent 3 days in a car driving North. Then 2 days staying with family and visiting friends. Followed by a train ride to Toronto and a weekend with friends. I am finally, finally settling in to my vacation with my kids and parents at the cottage. It’s been amazing and I enjoy the hustle and bustle and the change of scenery. I love that my days are mixed up and there is no routine. I love that I am completely on an escape from my regular day to day at home.
There is one thing that I have discovered through this past week and a half of upheaval from that day to day though. I need to write. I was without computer for a week and now that I am here and have my laptop, things are just happening. Vacation is happening. Moments are happening. Things are busy, we’re doing new things, I am showing my children the beauty of my favorite place in the world and immersing myself and them in the experience of this place.
That means, however, that I have little time to sit at my computer and get out the many rambling jumbled thoughts that are swirling in my brain each day. I find myself with my notebook at my side just so I can jot down moments, thoughts, ideas, so that I won’t forget them tomorrow. I have discovered that I don’t write because I want to or have nothing better to do. I write because I need to. By eliminating my means and mode of writing that I need it. It is part of me, it’s who I am and it is very important and an integral part of my personality. Each night as I’ve been falling asleep, I have felt a slight void because I wasn’t able to sit down that day and write.
When I think back on the last couple of years that have laid the framework for the life I live today and who I am becoming, I realize that so much of who I am and what I value and have found authentic for my life has come about by eliminating things and then discovering that I don’t need them. Not only, don’t I need them, but I am better off without them. So I am learning that it’s an important part of my life to learn what is truly me and what I truly value and what is really a part of me to remove it from my life and see what happens. Getting rid of old stuff that I don’t use anymore is a quick and easy way to visibly see how many things are around me that I just don’t need. I have yet to trek off to Goodwill with boxes of stuff from around my house and miss any of the stuff.
By minimizing my life, making things simpler and more bare, it is easier to see the things around me that I need or don’t need. By removing things, I can then search inside myself whether I really need it or not. It seems to be a decent way for me to have discovered the things that really matter. Take them away and see how it feels. If it feels good, fantastic. If it feels bare, empty and there is a void, put it back.
As for my writing, I know it won’t ever truly go away, because it’s part of me.
[...] Speaking of writers, I know I’ve mentioned Emily’s blog “Remodeling This Life” on Bring the Family, but a recent one she wrote really summed up how it feels to know you are a writer, whether or not you do so as your profession or business. Check it out here. [...]
The way you describe the process reminds me of sculpture. Every time you get rid of an unnecessary item or habit, you’re chipping away at a block of stone. The more you chip away, the closer you are to having something truly beautiful.
Thought not unpacking it or leaving it with my parents, I’ve discovered that I don’t need “stuff.” But I do need daily communication…whether through twitter or forums or blogs or real life. If I’m alone for a day without the internet or other people, it’s sad. Maybe a day, if I have a book. But I don’t like not talking with people.
Hi Emily! Thanks so much for you kind comments today.
This was another great post….great insight. Even though I am not looking forward to the possibility of having to move for my husband’s job, in a way I AM looking forward to it maybe happening because it will give me another opportunity to be more authentic. To get rid of more stuff I don’t need and only buy a house that is “enough” and not too much. I’m with you, I am really wanting to get real with what I need and eliminate everything I don’t.
Happy day (and I hope you’ll come back and share a creative budget friendly idea for hiding uglies or less than lovelies around the house…Monday you can link if you have any ideas to share!)
xo
I’m in the same both with MrsMicah too here it sounds. I find if I don’t have that daily interaction with people, whether through work, blogs, email, etc, I find myself feeling like I’ve missed something for the day.
@ the same time though, I see your point about missing moments as they pass by WHILE doing something. It’s nice to be ‘away’ from it all, but keeping the notebook by your side to jot down notes is always a good idea. I even go so far as to keep a handheld voice recorder in my car to verbalize the things I’m bound to forget 10 mins later.
Your words ring true here. I have never doubled-back to the Goodwill or ran to the recycle bin for the stuff that I have gotten rid of. And I doubt that I would. The first clue to me I had too much stuff was when I was married and we lived in an apt for a year while we built a huge new house. And a year later, when we separated (ok, he left me) most of the boxes were still in storage and I hadn’t missed them. But even then, I kept the stuff. Wasn’t quite ready topart with it. After moving it now 3 times in 6 years, it is being pared down- way down. And it feels good. And I have to say, giving my wedding dress away on Freecycle was about 40 pounds of my back.
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