An Exercise In Restraint
I had a bad afternoon. I prepared myself all day for my follow-up appointment from the surgery I had 2 weeks ago. I was prepared to either hear bad news that what they removed was cancerous or good news that it was not. I received good news! Yay! Then I had to be examined to make sure that I am healing properly. I was not planning on the next part. You may want to close your eyes for this. Apparently, there was some skin not healing correctly and without warning, the doctor sliced and then burnt it off. No numbing. Yes, that’s right. I don’t think I screamed that loud in child birth. It. was. awful.
So I am in pain all over again and get to recover from THAT for another 2 weeks and then go back for another follow up.
I walked out of the office, horrified, embarrassed and in tears. I am a girl you could call very open. I wear my heart on my sleeve, I try to keep it real and tell it like it is, I allow myself to be vulnerable and open myself up because it makes me feel human and alive. But having my butt sliced and burned? That crossed the line. I was humiliated at the entire experience.
So there I was in my car preparing to drive myself home and I had the urge to go shopping. Do something for myself to make up for the pain and humiliation. I wanted to indulge myself in something good, yummy, or fabulously cute. Then I stopped myself and realized that there was nothing that I wanted more to ease the pain of the experience I had just been through than to drive myself home, hug my husband, kiss my kids and curl up on my couch with a glass of wine and enjoy us all giggling together.
I knew that there was nothing I could buy that would make me feel better. I had everything I needed right at home.
April 30th, 2008 at 6:48 pm
Way to go. That must have been a lot of restraint. I can’t even imagine.
It’s not right for doctors to do that without at least talking to the patient, possibly putting some salve on it. I know a girl whose doctor performed a quick gynecological surgery on her without even getting her permission. One swift cut, which was useful but humiliating and painful for her since she had no choice in it.
I hope your butt feels better soon and your family makes you so happy!
April 30th, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Hugs! That must have been awful but it’s really good that you can go home to your family to recover and feel better. I’m sure you will probably laugh about it one day, maybe not today, but one day. And it’s really, really great that you didn’t indulge in the temptation of shopping! Hope you feel better soon!
April 30th, 2008 at 9:00 pm
I’m so happy to hear that the results are benign.
But shame on the doctor! How absolutely horrible! Did he explain what he planned on doing? Did he get your consent? He should have! Were you alone in the room with the doc? You should always be allowed a chaperon, especially with procedures that are in more intimate areas of the body.
Oooo, the nurse in me is getting riled up, so I’d better stop!
I hope you’re feeling better and enjoying time with your family.
April 30th, 2008 at 9:01 pm
Oh my! I definately would have treated myself after that. You are a strong woman!
Reminds me of my check up after my son’s birth. “Dr., why can’t I urinate without it killing me?”
“Uh-oh, looks like your episiotomy stiches didn’t heal–guess we’ll have to re-stitch you. Too bad you don’t have the epidural this time.”
Ouch.
April 30th, 2008 at 9:03 pm
oh emily! I’m so sorry! Ack…that just seems horrible, well just beyond horrible. Shame on that doctor! I hope that you found everything and more as you laid on your couch with your family sipping wine!
April 30th, 2008 at 9:05 pm
I’m so sorry you had to go through that. A little warning would have been nice…
I’m so glad you got good news, though!
April 30th, 2008 at 10:31 pm
How awful! Sorry that you had to go through that, but something needs to be done about that doctor. That is not right, at all. Maybe less restraint would be a good thing in this case.
April 30th, 2008 at 11:26 pm
That sucks! I would have kicked that doctor in the nuts.
But I am glad you got good news. Maybe you need a new butt doctor though. Kick in the nuts - no warning. i think it would be more cathartic than shopping.
May 1st, 2008 at 6:33 am
Thank you all for your kind words of support and even your outrage
There was another person in the room, a woman helping him. My only guess is that it happened the way it did otherwise if I’d been told ahead of time, I would’ve been too tense for him to do it. Maybe?
Anyway, walking out of the room, I did look and glare at him and tell him I wasn’t paying him today, but that I’d like him to pay me for doing that instead. Then I got the good news of there not being a copay.
May 1st, 2008 at 2:21 pm
Wow! Sorry that happened to you. I do think I’d be looking for a different Dr. with a better bed-side manner though!
May 1st, 2008 at 9:46 pm
Oh Emily!! I am so sorry that that happened to you. ((((BIG HUG)))) Well, chalk it up as a life experience. It is done and over with…never to happen again.