Something very odd happened recently. I didn’t expect it and it took me totally by surprise. I found myself making money from this blog. That’s not all that uncommon and I’m certainly not ready to retire off of it but the weird part came in how I suddenly viewed things after I received monetary compensation. I suddenly felt my blog was worth something. Nevermind the nearly 5 months before now that I was writing things of value to me and at times touching other people and adding to the lives of the people who read what I write. I didn’t actually feel like it was worthwhile until I received money. It instantly made it more important in my mind. A validation of sorts.

I got thinking about this and how silly it is, really. I mean, it’s not a lot of money and I’ve made much more in the past from other things since becoming a stay at home mom. And then I got annoyed at myself. Because as much as I love my blog as an outlet, a social source and a form of conversation with some really neat people and a place to share the random musings rattling around my brain, there are so many other things I do in my life that are just as or more “valuable” yet I dismiss them as such since I don’t get monetarily compensated for them. The biggest one being that I take care of my children all day in place of going off to a job that gives me a paycheck. I get paid in the life I live today in the form of sticky peanut butter and jelly faced kisses and ear rubbing. Yet I don’t give myself nearly enough credit for the work I do as a mom. Why do I do that? Is that a normal way to feel? Like it’s just a little bit less valuable and important because I’m not being paid? And if I was being paid would I place more importance on it? Maybe the excitement and value I initially placed on it was simply because it’s been a while that I’ve been compensated for something I’ve actually done and I felt valued.

That got me thinking about how I, and many others I know, place such an importance and such self worth on what we make in income. Maybe that is part of why the American Way has become what it has - bigger, better, more. Because what’s the use of getting a big fat raise if you don’t get to show it off to the world in the form of houses and cars and consumer goods? Does it really just come down to having to stop placing such an importance on money and really letting ourselves appreciate and value things even if they don’t create lots of cash for us?

There’s the old adage that The Best Things in Life are Free. It’s not like now that I have some cash in my pocket, I am planning to go buy some wonderful thing that means more to me than my family. Why then can’t I see the same idea in the other direction? The Best Things We Can Do in Life Are Unpaid, or something like that. Hugs, smiles, love, laughter…most of us aren’t lucky enough to find a way to do those things for an income. I need to let go of feeling like something I do suddenly holds more importance just because I get money from it. My family is still the most important job I have. Even if it’s payment comes in the form of sticky kisses.

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