Gah, I hate days like today. Yesterday was so great. Totally perfect, full of family and friend fun, a great Super Bowl game, complete with Tom Petty playing at halftime and Eli Manning pulling out the win.
But today – ugh today – I have mastitis so I’m miserable with that. I’m tired and cranky and have errands to do and cleaning to take care of. And I just don’t want to. I have projects to take pictures of and share here. But somehow transferring and uploading photos seems like a daunting task at the moment.
I think it may have a lot to do with spending an hour in the car today. My stereo isn’t working in there (hubby can’t remember the unlock password on it) so I don’t have anything to entertain myself in the car other than chattering children and my own thoughts. And I think because today started as an already emotional day for me – I cried when an online purchase at Best Buy took for-ever – that I just took that and ran with it and spent an hour thinking about what kind of person I am. Who my friends and what’s important to me. I got thinking about forgiveness and unconditional love and support and because Monkey’s 1st birthday is coming, I got thinking about this time last year and this time the year before and how everything has changed so much. I got thinking about how a little old person like me can think I’m a good person but have mad so many mistakes in my life. I know I’m not perfect, I don’t expect to be – but the list is long and depressing. I try hard. I think I’m a loyal friend and family member. I put others’ needs before my own a lot. I practice forgiveness and moving on from the past. At least where it’s accepted and warranted. Some people make it hard by not being able to let go themselves. I tell the people I care about how much I love them often and I show it even more often. But I stumble. A lot. And it gets me down. I guess all I can hope for is a better day tomorrow and I’ll just keep plugging away at today.
I’m sorry you’re having a bad day. Some days just seem to have a strong gravitational pull towards the crapper, don’t they?
I have some days like that, too. For me they usually coincide with the arrival of the dot. It’s not that many of the issues I’m dwelling on those days aren’t around the rest of the time; they are. For some reason, though, they seem to matter much more than on less hormonal days.
I think you’ve got the right attitude about it. I hope something happens tonight that puts a new, better spin on at least the latter part of the day. Tomorrow is a new day. Hopefully your mastitis will have eased by tomorrow so you can wake up pain-free and be off to a good start.
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*hugs* My day’s kind of been like that too. I’m almost thinking about calling in sick to work tonight, not because I’m ill but because I feel so icky and bad.
Do you have any good music mixes you can listen to now that you’re home? Maybe a comedy CD? YouTube comedy videos? If you look for “Creature Comforts” on YouTube, you should be able to find some cute animal animated sketches which are also G-rated (I think) so you can play them with the kids around.
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My heart goes out to you – mastitis is no small thing. I felt like death warmed over when I had it.
I hope that you’re able to find a space to nurture yourself in the simplest way (hot bath?) and move past this day at your own speed.
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